When you flirt with a woman, there are three main ways to flirt.

Being proactive is nice. You can just say or do something flirty out of the blue.

Alternatively, you can appear to be much more spontaneous by waiting for her to say something that you are ready for, and then shooting back a flirty response that takes them by surprise.

Finally, if you’re really clever, you can set them up. Do something that will get them to respond in a way that will lead to a great flirting line that you already have prepared.

Here are some examples of each:

TAKING THE INITIATIVE: Call her a name jokingly. Look at her funny. Be a little cocky. Active flirting is fun, but it’s a little more risky early on in an encounter. It puts your intentions “out there”, so you have to be pretty sure of the situation to engage in proactive flirting.

TRIGGERED FLIRTING: Triggered flirting can be even better than proactive flirting, because it appears more spontaneous and less planned. For instance, suppose she brags about herself. You could say, “That’s impressive. You’ve just earned 5 more minutes with me.” Reactive flirting can signal that you’re quick witted and ingelligent. And, of course, it doesn’t actually have to be spontaneous. You might have dozens of responses ready for common things girls say or do. It just has to look spontaneous to be effective.

SET-UP FLIRTING: Of course, if you want to look spontaneous, and you don’t want to wait for a girl to say or do something you have a pre-planned response for, you can always bait her into doing something that will set up a flirty response. For instance, you could bait her into bragging about herself by asking her a question like “so, what makes you so special?” Then let her brag. And then hit her with your pre-planned bragging banter line.

If you want to learn more about all these methods of flirting, pick up a copy of the book “Flirting Deconstructed”.