by Wendy Bridger

With Valentines Day around the corner, you see the typical gifts stocked in every store. Many women can expect to receive these token gifts: flowers, a box of chocolates, or a card. Some hope for something more meaningful this season: a small jewelry box containing an engagement ring, the symbol of moving their relationship to the next level.

Being proposed to is a special event for any woman. I’ll never forget the traditional military saber arch that my husband organized as he knelt at the end of it with my sparkling engagement ring and a simple, life changing question. How could I say no to such a set up? Saying yes to his proposal that day was the best decision of my life.

Sadly, the joy of this event fades all too soon for many new brides as the hype and the excitement of the wedding goes away and real life together begins. All too often, women fall for the presentation of the moment, and forget to ask themselves another important question ahead of time: “Is he the right one for me?”

Today, lots of couples choose to slide instead of decide in their relationships. They become acquainted with one another and like each other enough to go out. When nothing better comes along, they continue to stay with each other. After a while, they realize they’ve gotten along okay together and decide to move in together. Sooner or later, they get married for similar reasons. It’s just easier to move the relationship forward than it is to move on and let go, opening the door for a better relationship for the both of them. Through it all, they never stopped to ask, “Is this the right one for me?”

Believe it or not, studies show that those who live together before marriage have a higher chance of divorce. Why? I think it is because of this very reason. Instead of making a conscious decision on their compatibility, these couples slid into marriage by default.

Don’t be part of this statistic. As you get ready for this February 14th, make sure you take the time to decide on the future of your relationship. Make sure you ask, “Is he the one?” before he asks another life changing question.

Is it possible to answer the question, “Is he the one?” Your heart is fluttering too fast to make sense of it, and your friends and family all are biased. I recommend looking for an outside, impartial source to help guide you in answering this question. Compatibility tests combined with an honest evaluation from you is a great place to start. Remember, you can’t really control when he proposes, but you can make the effort to ensure you make the right choice when he does.

About the Author:

Wendy Bridger, MSSW helps women create lasting soul mate relationships. “Is He Right for Me?” is a compatibility test she offers to help women decide if their man is the one.